By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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