I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Randomize
