Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize