hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
i've created a new STD.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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