My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
