Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i can't believe i had my finger in that
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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