Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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