Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
