Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
