He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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