just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
