If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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