I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
