Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
