wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
there is puke in my bra ... again
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
