You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
