chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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