I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
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