A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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