they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize