JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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