He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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