My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Randomize