i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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