so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
