one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I'm determined to sit on that face.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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