Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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