it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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