I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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