I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
