I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
