i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
When are your genitals available?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
