Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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