And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize