I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
