I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I CAN MOONWALK!
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
