Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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