I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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