i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize