I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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