either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
