If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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