I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Then you guys just all showered together...?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Come on in and take your pants off
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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