Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
