Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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