Your tits are I can't wait for
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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