We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
