After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize