No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
