All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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