remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
