I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Let's get the cat blown out
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
